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Horace
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« on: March 14, 2007, 05:47:20 PM » |
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I'm not really as scary as some people think I am. (re something Julie said to me at reg one night)
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Socket
Bringer of Chaos
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BITE MY SHINY METAL @$$!
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« Reply #1 on: March 15, 2007, 07:44:02 AM » |
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Saw it before (couple weeks ago-ish) and its still funny cuz I deal with that every day.
"I need some help over here. The screen is blank and I can't wake it up."
"Is it turned on?"
"Yes, the machine is on, its lights are blinking, but I still can't see anything."
"I meant, is the screen turned on?"
"That matters? It doesn't just come on?"
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Dragontologist
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« Reply #2 on: March 15, 2007, 08:04:36 AM » |
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"My screen isn't displaying anything."
"Is the computer on? The lights in the front should be green."
"The screen has a green light, yeah."
"No, the actual computer, the box on the floor."
"You mean I need one of those, too?"
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--Felegro, Wind Taker
House Helvetia
Carpe Arborus
As Made (In)Famous By:
Andy Sirkin
Staff Suite/Con Suite
Assistant GM, Avatar System
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Horace
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« Reply #3 on: April 05, 2007, 05:50:17 PM » |
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Ok, I might have told some of you this one already.
Lady walks up to digital picture kiosk.
Moves the power cord from in front of the screen.
Peels "out of order sign" number 1 off the screen.
Peels "out of order sign" number 2 off the scanner cover.
Cuts the 4 layers of packing tape the scanner is taped shut with.
Peels "out of order sign" number 3 off the broken scanner glass.
Carefully lays her pictures on the scanner, such that none of them cover any cracks or holes in the glass.
Starts poking at the dark touch screen.
Interupts me when I'm helping 2 other people, "HEY YOU, WHY THE HELL CANT I SEE MY PICTURES? I'M IN A HURRY GET OVER HERE!"
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I'm not really as scary as some people think I am. (re something Julie said to me at reg one night)
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Sinkuu
MIB
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Getsuga TENSHOU!!!
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« Reply #4 on: April 09, 2007, 12:22:31 PM » |
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Ok, I might have told some of you this one already. Lady walks up to digital picture kiosk. Moves the power cord from in front of the screen. Peels "out of order sign" number 1 off the screen. Peels "out of order sign" number 2 off the scanner cover. Cuts the 4 layers of packing tape the scanner is taped shut with. Peels "out of order sign" number 3 off the broken scanner glass. Carefully lays her pictures on the scanner, such that none of them cover any cracks or holes in the glass. Starts poking at the dark touch screen. Interupts me when I'm helping 2 other people, "HEY YOU, WHY THE HELL CANT I SEE MY PICTURES? I'M IN A HURRY GET OVER HERE!" *poit* *twitch*     /facepalm |
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Horace
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« Reply #5 on: April 09, 2007, 05:02:18 PM » |
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Yup.
And no matter how much they need to hear it, you cant tell them what they so desperately need to hear....."Go down the highway a bit, you'll see a home depot. Go in to the hardware section and ask for Fred. Tell him I sent you for a crowbar. He'll explain what you need to do after that"
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I'm not really as scary as some people think I am. (re something Julie said to me at reg one night)
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Dr. Steed
Architect of the Console Matrix
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I serve the Master Control Program.
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« Reply #6 on: September 20, 2007, 04:41:59 PM » |
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The sound you just heard was yet another part of my soul dying.
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Adam Parnau
Assistant Director of Electronic Gaming
Double Exposure Senior Staff
"I am THE Doctor. The definite article, you might say."
-Doctor Who
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Oni no Ted
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All your browser are belong to us
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« Reply #7 on: September 20, 2007, 10:30:17 PM » |
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The horror of the help desk:
<over the phone>
Customer: "My cup holder broke"
Me: "Cup holder?"
Customer: "Yeah, the retractable one that says 'disc' on the front?"
Me: "Please hold"
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Mark
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If you're leaving scorch marks get a bigger gun.
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« Reply #8 on: September 21, 2007, 07:57:47 AM » |
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True story relayed to me by the tech who took the call:
I was working for a company in Colorado and we were in the process upgrading our customers' computers. The help desk gets a call from a client that's having trouble getting a software update diskette into the computer. It just doesn't want to go into the drive. After some questioning by the tech the customers says that she hadn't used these new disks and had a really hard time getting the disk out of the little plastic box that it came in. The new computers had 3.5" floppy drives instead of the older 5.24". She had actually broken open the plastic floppy and tried to insert the mylar film into the computer.
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We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all poker players are created equal, that they are endowed by their buy-in with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Raise, Call, Fold, and the pursuit of Pocket Aces.
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TheonlyShamus
9yr Olds ENVY ME!
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Its not stealing if it wasn't theres to begin with
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« Reply #9 on: September 21, 2007, 11:05:35 AM » |
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True story relayed to me by the tech who took the call:
I was working for a company in Colorado and we were in the process upgrading our customers' computers. The help desk gets a call from a client that's having trouble getting a software update diskette into the computer. It just doesn't want to go into the drive. After some questioning by the tech the customers says that she hadn't used these new disks and had a really hard time getting the disk out of the little plastic box that it came in. The new computers had 3.5" floppy drives instead of the older 5.24". She had actually broken open the plastic floppy and tried to insert the mylar film into the computer.
.........WOW......Thats the human race for ya. |
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I meditate, burn incense, and drink green tea.....BUT I STILL WANNA SMACK SOMEONE!!
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Dr. Steed
Architect of the Console Matrix
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I serve the Master Control Program.
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« Reply #10 on: September 21, 2007, 04:02:30 PM » |
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.........WOW......Thats the human race for ya.
Yeah. I think it's about time we give the ants a go. |
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Adam Parnau
Assistant Director of Electronic Gaming
Double Exposure Senior Staff
"I am THE Doctor. The definite article, you might say."
-Doctor Who
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TheonlyShamus
9yr Olds ENVY ME!
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Its not stealing if it wasn't theres to begin with
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« Reply #11 on: September 22, 2007, 10:14:24 AM » |
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What i love is my helpless desk as i call them. Me: Yeah from some reason i have a odd error code on my screen i already powered down my comp and restarted it, i then checked the error code on another comp and it seems to be a .exe file acting up so can you patch in so i can show you the file thats causeing me problems. Them: Well first lets restart your computer. Me: Well first can you put me on the phone with someone with a IQ higher then a 90 and not one that has the IQ of a baked potatoe (yes i did say that once to a tech i was haveing a really bad day because this computer was our main DPW[digtal production workstation for those who dont understand the abbreviation] it allows me to access all customer files to run jobs for as we all know i work at FEDUPSTINKOS i meen fedexkinkos and i make alot of copies a day).  |
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I meditate, burn incense, and drink green tea.....BUT I STILL WANNA SMACK SOMEONE!!
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